Welcome to the Afterwife

 

Welcome to the Afterwife

One of my favourite photos is of my youngest son & I, taken on a beach in Ixtapa, Mexico. He’s just turned 4 years old and I am holding his tiny body next to mine with one arm. We’re looking at each other and laughing as the waves crash around us.

The photo was taken in April, 2019. I was in the best shape of my life – my tanned arms are defined and toned, my abs flat and legs strong and muscled from running, weight training and yoga. I used to look at that photo with wistfulness and wonder: how could I have looked so perfect yet been so miserable? Because April 2019 was the beginning of the end of my marriage.

Fast forward 3 years: 7 years of healing, of forgiveness, of blogging, of moving forward with kindness and dignity.  I have grown so much emotionally and spiritually since my divorce but unfortunately, my spirit isn’t the only thing that has grown. Sometime over the course of a stressful divorce, a failed engagement and the double-edged sword of single parenting – it’s at times both incredibly busy and frighteningly lonely – I lost touch with my physical self.

But I never forgot how it felt to be strong and lean, to run with ease and lightness. So I decided to do something about reconnecting with that feeling.

I started hiking the heavenly North Shore trails several times a week with friends and my Glorious Golden, Dug,  joined a fabulous group of women in Pilates twice a week at Esprit de Core and re-opened my yoga membership at a yoga academy. My confidence came back fast & furious and I was loving the energy, mental clarity and sense of accomplishment regular exercise gave me. For some reason though, I wasn’t seeing the type of results that I was hoping for and became frustrated when the scale didn’t move as quickly as I thought it should.

Then three things happened. I think the order was serendipitous:

I had the opportunity to attend a Wellness Week & Yoga Retreat at the wonderful XXX Centre which helped me look at some of the habits that had developed over the years – including emotional eating and a sneaky wine habit – and gave me the tools and support to kick them and make healthier, more mindful choices. I also met some amazing people who were also committed to being their best selves and I am fortunate to call those people my support network and more importantly, my friends.

I met The Ginger Snap, a man who awed me with his kindness, athleticism and if we’re being honest, his fantastic ass. He loves me as I am but inspires me to be better in every aspect of my life.

After not seeing one another for a decade, I had a chance encounter with one of my first mentors, Mijanou Serre, who over a catch up lunch told me that she had become a natural body builder and achieved great results her trainer and Isagenix. When I told her that I wanted to run a 13km trail race this summer she kindly but firmly told me that although my activity level was impressive, my nutrition would need to change if I wanted to run with ease and reach my goal. I listened and agreed. It was time for a change.

I committed to a 30 day Isagenix cleanse with Mijanou monitoring my overseeing the program including adapting it for my activity level. She’ll also be charting my progress and suggested that I blog about the experience in order to be accountable, to share my story and hopefully inspire others to make changes in their own lives. I realized that this was exactly what I needed to do: I needed to step out of my Divorce Investigation and into my After Wife runners.

So over the course of the next 30 days I’ll be writing about my experience: my ups & downs, highlights & low days, successes & set backs. I promise not to write about what I’m eating because no one gives a shit about my salad. I hope you’ll join me on my journey & be inspired to chart your own course to becoming your best self.